Most of us learned early that fitting in feels safe. We learned it on playgrounds, in classrooms, and at the dinner table, long before we had words for it.

Debbie Harrell, host of the New World Normal Podcast, joined me on the DaliTalks Podcast and shared where that lesson started for her. As a kid she was scrawny and raised by a single mom at a time when that was less common. She was on her own a lot, and she became a target for bullying. Looking back, she realized why she spent so many years trying to be seen as normal. Conforming kept her safe.

That honest answer stayed with me, because it is true for so many of us. We may not have been bullied the way Debbie was, but we all learned that standing out can cost us something.

When conforming becomes the plan

Those early lessons do not disappear when we grow up. They turn into the plan. We check the boxes we were told to want. We tie our identity to our job title. We measure success by what we are told success looks like.

Debbie sa...